People say things like "Trying doesn't count" when referring to relationships. The truth is, it does make a difference. When our partner can see that we are trying to do those things that are important to them, they feel loved. Being response-able is very critical step toward creating a loving environment.
When we have a fight with our partner and they can see that we have listened to them because we are trying to do those things that were said, damn right it makes difference. Trying is not necessarily about grand gestures, small things work just as well. Writing a note, keeping agreements, being on time, being patient and kind are all small things that work.
So, the next time someone says to you that trying is for kids, don't listen.